“These points weren’t tender before. Seems like we should do a CT screening again”- these words struck me like a thunder bolt. A multitude of memories flashed through my mind. The verandas at Medical College, the radiation suit, the stem cell transplant room, the dark corners of the car parking ground at Lakeshore…everything. Sigh! Is the crab back again? Is the Lady fit enough to fight it again? I’m not really sure this time.
It was the beautiful healthy life free of cancer that gave her hope then. A bubbly energy filled cutie being restricted to the walls of a house is not a pleasant visual. But the very fact that I still have my Amma to hold my hands is all that I care about. I know, she hates not being able to walk around without those heavy braces to support her spine. I know, she feels terrible watching Achan busy with the household chores all alone. I know, she feels helpless missing travelling to Thrissur, my Better Half’s stomping ground. Yet, is life beautiful? I think yes, it is.
So then? As usual, the theatrics. She stares at me, scared. Oh come on, it’s nothing; I shake my head. Achan stares at me. Oh dear! It’s going to be nothing; I shake my head. Hope my palpitations weren’t loud enough to reach their ear drums.
The CT room. Done with the scan.
I rush to the Radiologist. Points a gun and commands, “opine…now.”
Suspense filled moments. The heaviest drain of adrenaline that I’ve had in recent times.
“Seems, we don’t have new lesions anywhere.”
Had she taken longer to utter this, she’d have had to announce a code blue. How long can someone hold his breath?
“Hmmm. Nice. We’ll wait for the blood reports then. Saved for now,” said the Oncologist.
A happy family rushes home.
(For those who came in late: The Lady who Killed the Crab aka Sobhanacharitham Onnam Khandam )