Saturday, July 26, 2008

A Love that got ‘FLUSHED’ out…!!!

(Based on a True Story…)

It’s a kind of roller-coaster ride that I have every weekend…the travel from Kollam to Trivandrum…in one of the rusty ‘luxurious’ coaches provided by the KSRTC. But I just love it… cool…’shaking all de way’…lovely bumpers and gutters that rarely let me doze off in the side seat…the dusty gale that hits me throughout, ‘sneezing’ the hell out of me…

I started sensing something quaking within me…!!! Every human carries with him two artefacts that beat throughout. One is the red mass that cries ‘lubb dubb lubb dubb’ the other is an artificial implant that cries ‘tring tring tring tring’.

I picked the call
Neetz: Hellooooooo
Me: Hey…louder…
Neetz: …wooo…seems you are on wheels ha…can’t hear…
Me: Yeah…will ring you once I reach there…
Neetz: Wait, I have news for you…don’t turn red at me after hearing that…neither should you turn blue…okay?
Me: Okay…
The news that made way overrunning the poor signal reception literally ‘shook’ me.
Someone who used to travel with me all the time…someone who used to be with me even in the darkest hours when even my shadow would leave me...was no more…
Poor thing…too unlucky…a real ‘filthy’ death…getting ‘flushed’ off!!!




Memories started driving in…



I was about to ask the shopkeeper to bill the model that I held when she arrived…with her friends…
I felt she was calling me…I walked towards her…took her out of the packet…hoo real beauty…she was slim…shiny…
Don’t know what attracted me…she was not that feature rich…but still we developed a tight bond instantly…’love at first site’
That was my new phone…MOTOROLA L6…I was holding the first piece that reached the shop. Without a second thought I bought her…and made my first call, "Amma…I’ve bought a new mobile…"



There began a new chapter…
Attending the call of nature or having a shower where the only times when I left her alone…we ruled the world all other times…played…sang…danced. She was always there to soothe me…make me smile… She would remind me, "Hey it’s Srikanth’s Birthday today...go greet him" or "Stupid…its exam today wake up"…and so on…



I used to dress her up with a new ‘crystal’ case every week (but she looked best without the case…her sleek body…the mini curvatures…hoo…sexy bitch!!!)
Once I threw her away with rage…for running out of battery…interrupting a ‘chat’… But that turned me into an insomniac for a night…I feared if she would die…but thank god…nothing happened
I didn’t really care when people mocked at me…many actually hated Motorola…grrr…’idiots’
Yeah she had short comings…I couldn’t send a picture message…save a movie (her bosom was not big enough to hold them)…and a lot many tiny defects …but I never blamed her…I loved her…for she was my first love…!!!



...months sprang away…
Almost a year passed by…and the new guy walked in to showrooms…Nokia N73…bigger…hundred times smarter… I could hardly wait to get it implanted into my pockets…
And came the big day…when the beast that was myself sold her for cash…no…I didn’t really trade her…I sent her into safer hands…to my dearest pal…Neetz… ‘Safer’ hands indeed…Neetz wouldn’t drain her battery…give her too much work load.
I bought my new buddy…N73…He made me a prince…for I was the first to hold him in my class…
Even when he was a trillion times better than my lovely Motorola…I used to ring Neetz, to know how my little girl was doing…Neetz gave it to her dad…and he was having her now…



Well folks…here is the rest of the conversation:



Neetz: da Nithin…sorry da…something bad happened…
Me: Oh! C’mon tell…I can hear you…
Neetz: Dad was on his way to attend some conference…by train…and he went to the toilet to free his bladder…then he got a call and picked it…and…
And…da…
She then slipped off his hands…
Me: WHAAAAAAAT…he dropped her into the toilet???? Oh! Lord…my girl…
Neetz: Yupp
Me: n then…oooooooo….So why didn’t he pull the CHAIN???????
Neetz: Hi hi…he pulled the chain indeed…hi hi…but only water came out…!!!
Me: Grrrrrrrrrr…not the flush tank idiot…the train’s chain
Neetz: Ha ha…you wanted him to stop the train to recover a phone…??? K leave it buddy...cheer up…I am sorry anyway…




AND MY SLIM BEAUTY DIED…A REAL FILTHY DEATHBED…
CAN’T IMAGINE A MORE HORRIBLE DEATH…GETTING FLUSHED OFF…THAT TOO INTO A ROYAL DEATHBED MAINTAINED BY THE INDIAN RAILWAYS…PERHAPS SHE GOT CRUSHED…OR FOUND HER WAY INTO A PILE OF TRASH…OR DID SOME RAG PICKER GET HER…?
I DON’T KNOW…BUT HONEY WHEREVER YOU ARE…HEAVEN OR EARTH…YOU STILL LIVE IN MY HEART…MY FIRST LOVE…!!!



(yippie....exams over....n im bak again.........!!!!!!!!!!)

40 comments:

Hemanth Potluri said...

hahahahahaahahhahahahahaha.......that was too funny....so u darling got flushed away in the toilet of a local train darn....shoot anyways u got ur N73 ..rock on with it..heheh..but ur slim babe slipped away...lets have a funeral for it...hahah..lol

urs..hemu..

k.ø.c.h.ü said...

Actually dear...de story goes thus...ma darling was recovered by a worker from track...but she was paralysed...!

Hemanth Potluri said...

lol....u should shown her to a doc and she could have come bac to life ahahahha...

urs..hemu..

P.S: still angry u dint visit other blogs wer i sent a word in my main blog ...tupid pellow

Pooja said...

at tyms v get rly attached 2 inanimate objcts...same wth me wen it come 2 my lappy...i love it...

poor u!!!i sympathise...;)

Priya Joyce said...

ha ha , had fun reading it ur mobile or ur grl frnd I was in doubt. I guess she's in heaven. have u organised a funeral. he he Lol

tat was just a joke I actually sympathize.

Sameera Ansari said...

Loved it!You are so good at narration and the humor,awesome!

Accept my condolence dude :P

Exams over eh?Enjoy!

Have a good weekend :)

Unknown said...

Your best yet!?! :)

Anonymous said...

There u go again....script writing!! hehe....good.....Medicine and script writing.....deadly contrasting combination....
I liked the script but. Keep up the good work, friend.

Saranya S said...

A well written and enjoyable post! awesome narration. Had a good laugh. Hope u r v relaxed after ur exams and practicals. Have a great time :)

SMRITI said...

Lol.... :D

I'm glad I read this the first thing (6.15AM to be exact) on a Sunday mornin... a day I have to go to office to..grrr :|

Anyways, I had a Motorola L6 too and I loved it...of course ticked me off a few times for not havin an extendable memory...but yeah she was the most beautiful thing I had back then...hihihihi...

I traded my Moto too for a better one..dont know whatever hppnd to her :(

But damn man!! Your post was awesome...i'm like "Gosh..Nithin's writing a serious post on Love?? "...LOL whatever was I thinking?? :D You surprise me every single time dude...and err..flush...was a horrible death for it. May its parts rest in peice...i mean peace...

And congratulations on reading that AMAZING AMAZING book... good job...so wen's the next blue moon coming wen u pick up a book? :P

k.ø.c.h.ü said...

wow...yippieeeee.hoooiiiiii....u people r making me too happeee....thnks alll....!!!!! ;-)))

mitra said...

Thats an interesting narration,doc.
loved it for its deft humour.:)

k.ø.c.h.ü said...

wow thanks mitra.. im chkin in to yer posts...!!!

zrestha said...

hey very nice post

zrestha said...

hey very nice post

Unknown said...

kidilam aliya.dis s d 1st one,im readin, frm u.liked v v v much

k.ø.c.h.ü said...

Thanks machu! Read de others too
:-)

Thana Lekshmi said...

Hey just passed by your blog..
Great posts there... :)

And the post titled "Krishna you've got mail"....
haha...
Its super cute i tell ya.. loved it.. :D

k.ø.c.h.ü said...

Wow thanks! Yippie

Hemanth Potluri said...

some one dint check my blog grrrr one slap ...and wer r the sms's i dint get even one stupid...i am goin to come to u ur college and kick ur doc a** ...heheh lol...

urs..hemu..

Unknown said...

Dude, that was one of the spectacularly spun posts that I have read so far;)
Accept my heartfelt condolences doc... that was a sordid end for ur lady love!

Unknown said...

I thought you said your beautiful darling was recovered by a worker from the track and was paralysed, so why is evryone asking for a funeral O_O

Anyways... Have you taken her to the Doc???Hope you are not letting go of ur first love :P :P
How is she coping??? Here's wishing her a speedy recovery ;) ;)

And abt your writing talents- he he, u already kno :D

k.ø.c.h.ü said...

Dishhhh

oops...my head's just hit de roof! Hi hi.thanks 2 all my 'cutest' pals...

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Arun said...

dude.. that was hilarious... loved every bit of it.. all i write is controversial posts... i likw thw kinda writin u do... Kudos!!

k.ø.c.h.ü said...

Thnks arun!:-) yeah i checked yer blog(couldn't read de posts in detail...will do once i get home) pretty serious posts...nice...so welcome 2 ma blog whenever u need a dose of smile

JustMe said...

a good read!!

now this is the third reference to mobile in ur stories!!!

Quest said...

Getting flushed in toilet....the cell must have got a real roller coaster ride to death ;)

chethan shenoy said...

Sad story, i dnt know wat u did post the news... but my reaction wud have been very violent... i wud bang my head on the table, or say, buy a half, put on my W300i and play some In Flames to cool down!

Arps said...

awww...... sorry for u...
lost ur 'first love' thant bad!!

but was good fun reading the obtuary tho.. :) :)

Stranger in the mirror! said...

sorry BOUT YOUR loss...bt ur writing inevitably brings a smile:) keep the good work goin doc!

Rineez said...

hehe..uhh oh mm yeh that ws supposed to be sad.. sorry man..

My First love-Samsung-C130!
yeh i know what u be thinkin, like who on earth buys samsung's mobiles.

But thats the real beauty dude..
say parmanant shtyle ;-)

Unknown said...

good.. nice narration :)

Diana Sahu said...

Very sad yaar Kochu.....Is she still undergoing treatment for paralysis??

Take good care of her.

Nyway, N73 is my dahling too..but off late, its starting to giv me troubles...the camera wnt click....the phone's slow...the list is endless...the only good part is that the music quality is good.

Chalo....ur posts always make me smile...very well written.

k.ø.c.h.ü said...

@diana

my n73 has grown ol' too...itz coughin wenever i say 'run' 'click' etc :)

k.ø.c.h.ü said...

@preethi

thanx..keep in touch

k.ø.c.h.ü said...

@rineez

ahem ahem samsung..? :)

k.ø.c.h.ü said...

@dewdropz

:)

Destiny's child... said...

Lol...that was funny.:D
I have only one problem with ur write-up. Why was Motorola 'she' n Nokia 'he'? Gender bias...pattilla pattilla ...:p

k.ø.c.h.ü said...

@destiny

he he!!! ee slim slim ennoke parempam oru 'she' mayamalle...porathene nokiakkoru gambeeryama!!!